Our Dear Railways Minister....

I was in half a mind to call this post aalu prasad yadav (I refuse to use capitalization for his name, on principle) on account of the time when TV cameras caught the then CM of Bihar proudly cooking Aalu for his darling wife, but I decided against insulting the staple food of Poland... At least potatoes serve a lot of purpose.

That said, let me shed some light on my perceptions of our current, highly respected and successful Railways Minister, lallu (yes the pun is intended! and in future i shall refer to him as just lallu) prasad yadav. Said lallu has 9 children, 2 boys and 7 girls, in protest against the forced sterilization during the emergency. Of course not for his satisfaction! Duh, you guys should realize it was REALLY hard work for him and it was a great self sacrifice for a very noble cause. He should be awarded the Bharat Ratna for....

His love for his nation was further demonstrated when he elected his wife Rabri Devi to be his succesor when he was forced to resign because of the Fodder Scam. She also did her part in serving her country when she joined him in Jail (yes he's a frequent "guest" there). So have all his fellow party members who have criminal charges against them.

Oh and did I mention that he was charged also with possesing disproportionate assets... Hmmm i wonder where he got all that money and time between serving his country, protesting against the emergency and cooking aalu for his wife and kids.

One of lallu's greatest achievements in his sojurn as the railways minister was the introduction of (wait for it) earthen pots for selling tea in stations instead of plastic cups. I must admit he must have had a brain wave and run screaming eureka... After all, us lesser mortals can only think of styrofoam containers or even bio-degradable (recycled) paper cups instead of plastic. And his Idea has changed my life. I mean i drink tea only out of earthen pots in stations and trains, I swear!

My friend (who is a staunch supporter of lallu) once told me that lallu has single handedly turned around the railway sector and that his policies are studied in Harvard and IIM. To him and all of you out there I say, if after 11 years of mistakes in politics, if a person still doesnt know what works, then he aint just a lallu... And only a lallu takes 11 years of mistakes to help create a success of the next 4 years!

As the time comes near for a next (older) generation of Gandhis (a.k.a Congress) and BJPs to take over the running of an (at best) shaky government, I say, hail all the lallus out there for these people really DO manage to make a difference... And maybe in about another 200 years we'll be developed!!!

The Taj Mahal

Probably one of the first things that comes to mind when people think of India, other than the poverty, is the Taj Mahal. More than understandable. I had the opportunity of going there fairly recently, with friends. It simply took my breath away. But that is not what this particular post is about.

The entry fee for Indians is 20 rupees per head and foreigners its 750. That, to a certain extent is understandable; it is a beautiful source of money flow into India. So we have the Taj Mahal, our National heritage in Agra, which is by now one of the richest tourist spots in India. In the off-season, say about a 100 people (minimum number, I assure you) visit the Taj, the tourism department makes about 2000 bucks per day. This is just from Indians. And those who've been to the Taj will agree with me I'm sure, at least 10 foreigners can be seen there at any given time of the day, even in the off season. But I shall let it slide for now.

Well, those who visit Agra for the magnificent Taj also see the Agra fort, the palace where Mughal emperors like Jahangir, Shah Jahan and Aurangazeb lived. It is truly a feast for the eyes to witness the opulence and grandeur in which these people lived. I, for one, could literally visualize them walking along the beautiful corridors flanked by Gardens, fountains and intricately worked columns. One note of reality however kept jarring on this day dream of mine. It pained me to see it so badly maintained despite the huge influx of money from the tourism sector. In true "desi" style, the walls have been scribbled on; absolute rubbish, that makes me hang my head in shame when a foreigner smirks at it. Would the same Indian dare scribble like this on the statue of Liberty? I wonder. What is it that makes us respect another country and its heritage more than our own????

Another eye sore at the Agra Fort would be the moss and moulds present on so many of the walls and ceilings. Don't the politicians care at all? After all, these places are their meal ticket! The intricate work on the red stones and the marble has been masked by layers of dust and grime. I mean how expensive can getting a cleaner in be for Godness' sakes??? Or is it that the government is spending all the money on education for the poor or for medical facilities? Nope, that ain't the case either. The poverty is so goddamn evident. Just outside the Taj you can find little kids selling trinkets to passerbys, some even reciting shers, instead of being in school. This, to me, was the most heartbreaking of all.

So now we come to the most important question of all. Where, exactly, does all the money go? Besides this unaccounted for money, most of the shops outside the Agra Fort and Taj sell goods way higher than their M.R.Ps. On questioning, the shopkeepers are not able to produce proper documentation for this "inflation" in prices and imply that the cops will back them rather than us. More black money into the government workers pockets. Can nothing be done to question these practices???

If this is the condition in the most widely publicized and spotlight-ed place in India, is it any wonder that India is, after 60 years of independence still developing?